London (Part Two)

Where: London, UK


Date: Sunday January 11th 2009

9:51pm: I am walking down some narrow stairs after leaving a giant prostitutes flat and being offered a cup of tea by a tiny hunchbacked old lady. We are following a big black man. Not because we want to but because he is bigger than us and its dark and quiet outside. He insists on showing us where we can have "a couple more pints". We would much rather be on our way home to our beds.


9:52pm: We follow the man man around the corner onto the dark quiet street we met him on. It is no longer dark and quiet. It seems that in the 8 minutes in which we spent trying to find a way out of a prostitutes flat the once dark secluded street between Leicester Square and Soho has turned into the Moulin Rouge. Bright neon signs glow and scantly clad ladies stand in doorways.


9:53pm: The man herds us through a door covered by a curtain into an empty bar before we have a chance to argue. The 'bar' is more of a small lounge with a tiny bar in the corner, a BIGGGGGG bartender and two naked girls dancing with each other. We are the only two other people present. Me and Brendan decide, through the power of telepathy, that we will have one beer and run away. 


9:54pm: Brendan and I approach the barman and order two beers. He pours two pints, hands them to us and asks for £30.....
.....
9:55pm: We sit down with our beer. Brendan is thirty quid worse off as a result of us both being too terrified to not pay the massive beefy bloke giving us beer. We are seated  in front of the naked ladies who are still dancing. We sit in silence for a minute drinking our beer. We may as well enjoy the 'show'.


9:56pm: The music stops and the girls leave. We sit and wait for whatever is going to happen next.


10:00pm: After sitting in silence drinking our highly expensive beer in an empty room for five minutes the barman informs us that the place is shutting and we need to "fuck off out now!". We don't need asking twice.


10:01pm: We are outside the 'bar' on what has suddenly become a dark, secluded street again. The Moulin Rouge has gone. The only people on the street are now two scared men and one big black fella staring at us. He grins a big grin and says two words.


10:02pm: "Follow me!"


......we run towards Leicester Square and go home!